LOOKING TO 2021
Well, many people are ready to leave 2020 behind and move into 2021. I am hearing and seeing a lot of hope, which is a beautiful thing. What happened to all your plans for 2020? For much of the world with the SARS-CoV-2 coronavirus pandemic, most likely most plans were either derailed or completely obliterated. That might have felt hard, and some of it might have felt like a relief. Maybe change came through your life like a tornado. Maybe the year was a lesson in surrender. Maybe it all came down to just surviving one day at a time. If you are reading this, congratulations on making it here, and continuing to breathe through it.
So what about 2021? Is there even a point to having hopes, dreams, goals, prayers, intentions, invitations? Yes of course there is, there always is. Whilst true joy actually comes from living in the moment (someone tell my Capricorn moon that), we as humans do like to plan, and of course our capitalist society has also conditioned us to always be striving for more. There is a sweet spot in there that can feel really nourishing, and that is what we are going to explore in this short article.
A FRESH START
We have been culturally conditioned in the west to think of each Gregorian calendar year as a fresh start (to sell us things and keep us on the hamster wheel always striving for more, of course). And maybe you find the start of a year helpful as a refocus and to redirect you on your life purpose path, or maybe it only causes you stress. If 2020 taught us one thing, it is that we need to be true to our values. I know many people have been moving closer to family, looking at job or career changes, coming back to the land, growing gardens. These are things that matter.
start at the beginning
Check in with yourself, right now. How are you feeling? Like actually feeling, in your bones, in your heart. Getting really present and honest with yourself is the MOST IMPORTANT part of looking to change anything. Because that’s what this New Years’ Resolution jazz is all about- making changes. But guess what, you don’t have to change anything. You don’t need to make resolutions, goals etc. You are perfect just as you are. If you do want to make changes, you need to get present with where you are now. Do you have all your basic needs met right now? (More on basic needs here) Are you starting from a place of safety (nourishing food, clean water, a roof over your head, clean air, healthcare, a sex life you are content with, and sleep/rest)? If not, that’s where you may start.
making plans: what’s in a name?
“It’s time to make your New Years’ Resolutions.” But 80% of New Years’ Resolutions are broken by February. Some folks then suggest we should make goals instead? We are told that our goals need to be SMAART in order for us to achieve them (specific, measurable, achievable, actionable, realistic, timely). What we hear through societal messaging is: “Do, do, do, push, push, push, achieve, achieve, achieve. You are not good enough as you are, you must do more.” I call timeout on this crap. Inhale, exhale. There, you have done enough.
Let’s come back to ourselves as sovereign beings. We can look at planning for the future in a nourishing way. We can take a look at our life and see in which areas we are not as nourished as we could be, by our own standards, in line with our own values. We can choose to leave those things as they are, especially for now with everything going on, or we can look at making changes. There are different words we can use as a framework for making changes: dreams, goals, aspirations, resolutions, intentions, prayers. Each of those has a slightly different meaning, and can actually feel very different to hold. Maybe one of those words feels more approachable or nourishing for you. They each have a different energy behind them.
To me:
Dreams feel expansive, open, and distant. It gives a lot of room for possibility, and not much focus.
Goals feel focussed, narrow, pushing, and all about the target, not about the journey to get there.
Aspirations feel awe-inspiring, a bit pie-in-the-sky, and almost intangible unless made more specific.
Resolutions feel strict, harsh or punishing, laser-focussed, without room for growth.
Intentions feel like a middle ground of focussed but not too narrowed, and give some wiggle room for growth, but still will-exerting.
Prayers feel like an opening to surrender to the higher being of your devotion, and really hinge on faith. It acknowledges you’re not in the driver’s seat, but you also may not even be in the car. It might leave out free will and your part in it all.
Maybe one of these words feels good for you to use in your desire to make changes. Maybe you use multiple words in slightly different ways: I always had dreams and goals, and the last few years I have been playing with intentions and goals. Yet none of those feel right for me looking to 2021.
What is missing for me, and maybe for you, is the opening. The opening that there could be more possibilities than what my mind at this current time could imagine. That the universe/Goddess/God/Creator/quantum has more up its proverbial sleeve if only we allow it in. Enter: Stargazer Li and Inviting 2021.
INVITATIONAL BEING
You know when you look at your life and think you never could have imagined it like this? (for better or worse) It’s kind of like that, but more. It is radically exciting to invite in possibility; there could be more than your brain could think up. You know when you are pushing and working and trying to get or manifest something and it’s just not happening? It’s so frustrating, depressing, and upsetting. We might feel like a failure. In this way of being that Li is introducing us to, coming up against a brick wall again and again with no way around it is a clear indication that there’s not the energy to move that thing forward. Let it go. Instead, pay attention to what there is energy for. What are the breadcrumbs before you? This requires us to pay full attention to what is happening around us. Li says then we can be a human BEING, not a human DOING. And the languaging around inviting in is quite different. Instead of: “I want to get fit next year”, the invitation might be “Moving strongly”. And you can co-create this invitation with the world, as a human being. The actual words matter and can morph over time. Maybe my definition of “fit” is something very aesthetic and not nourishing for me, and instead “moving strongly” allows me to do something I love, that actually might not create the aesthetic I thought was the goal. Yet my life is actually all the more nourished for that. For example, in my life, I no longer have the weightlifting muscles I used to since there’s not a covid-safe way for me to do it in the way I loved, but I am learning to surf. I am moving strongly (usually strongly falling off the surfboard!).
So far my 2021 invitations are:
-Breathe free
-Be in play
-Live more homely
-Move stronger
-Allow unfolding, in integrity
Your turn. What keeps coming up again and again around you? What opportunities, words, art, are before you? What is there energy or momentum to shift? Pay attention. What are you being invited to participate in with your homie, the universe?
This is a completely radical shift for me and I am actually excited to see what is invited in next year. If you would like to learn more about Inviting 2021, please check out Li’s website.
And on goals, I still have goals or tangible things I need to get done. I use the Many Moons Lunar Planner for that, which I have used for several years and has been so immensely helpful. I do also use astrology and tarot as tools for checking the “weather”. But the bigger, life-altering stuff: that’s going to be invitational. I am ready for more.
Whatever you are inviting in for 2021, may it bring you much nourishment. The comments are open if you would like to share your invitations or reflections.